Being a parent is the hardest job in the world. And I’m not talking dirty diapers and tantrums here. I’m talking about being the one guiding your child through life and helping them to make decisions that will affect them forever.

We were at the swimming pool at our rental house tonight (one last swim before the tenants move in this weekend) and watching LG in the pool gave me such a clear picture of how we can affect her positively and negatively. Since I’m not really a swimmer, I’m nervous in the pool and when she wants to hang on me, it’s really stressful for me because it’s hard enough for me to feel comfortable enough keeping myself upright without a 33 pound human hanging all over me. Luckily for her though, her dad is there, too.

It’s been really awesome watching her over the course of the past few weeks as she gets braver and braver in the water. Tonight she was brave enough to let go of Mike’s hands now and then and float (in her swim vest) on her own. I was so proud of her and I can see that she’s probably going to be a natural swimmer (thank God). I told Mike that I get angry at my parents every time I get in the pool because I wish they would have forced me to take swimming lessons when I was a kid so that I could swim now. The older you get, the harder it is to overcome your fear. I’m sure that given the right circumstances, I could probably learn how to swim, but it’s really really scary to me to just let go and float. But she is facing her fears and doing it. And I’m doing everything in my power to not pass my fears onto her. That is the hard part.

My friend is going through a difficult time trying to decide whether or not to push her daughter to do something that her daughter is nervous and/or afraid of. And my heart goes out to her because I think the hardest thing that we have to do as parents is to try to figure out when to push and when not to. Even though you know inside that pushing them might be the “right” thing to do, you also know that it might not be the “best” thing to do.

There is one thing I do know, however. My friend is an awesome mom, and I am sure that if she follows what her heart tells her to do, it will be the right thing. And either way, she has people who will love and support the both of them.

Crazy person that I am, I drug myself and Mike out of bed at 2:45 am to watch the lunar eclipse. It was fascinating watching the moon “disappear” and I could understand how that would have been unnerving in ancient times - not knowing why it was happening and if the moon would ever show up again. Now scientists can not only tell us exactly why it happens and what time the lunar eclipse will occur in every time zone, but when the next one will happen as well (Feb 21).

It got me thinking about how much technology influences our lives, which took me on a technological trip down memory lane… (Read on …)

20 ways to lower your grocery bill. via sk*rt

Do you ever accidentally forget your laundry in the washing machine during the long, hot summer? I can’t begin to tell you how many times I’ve done that. This little tip will help you get rid of that sour smell that is sometimes left over afterwards. Just make sure you read and follow the directions carefully.

I had way too much fun playing with this zip code map. via mental_floss

College textbooks were ridiculously expensive when I was in school, and I’m sure they’re not any better nowadays. Here are some tips to help you save some money.

How to get any stain out of your carpet. via Lifehacker

Want flatter abs? Then eat!

If you’re a wine lover, you might get a kick out of this.

Need a gift for twins? Try these cute little twin shirts. (But the triplet set is my favorite.)

First there was The Dangerous Book for Boys, then The Daring Book for Girls, and now we have The Great Big Glorious Book for Girls!

One day there might be a world without redheads. At least natural ones.

I may have to get this for Little Girl. ;)

This makes me nostalgic for the old days of cassette tapes. But only a little.

There will be a total lunar eclipse in the wee hours of Tuesday morning. via Parent Dish

A pretty idea for a centerpiece

Think your kids will wake up to the sound of the smoke alarm? Not necessarily. I got this story by video in an email, and I couldn’t locate the video online, but I uploaded it so you can view it if you choose to do so. via Marlene

See What You’re Made Of - Visit The Official Site

Pretty recipe of the week

Tip of the week: To quickly chill beverages, place the bottles in a bucket and add a layer of ice followed by a layer of salt (coarse or table). Repeat until you almost reach the top. Then fill the bucket with cold water to just below the ice line. The water will be colder than normal and the beverages should be chilled in less than 10 minutes! (from Martha Stewart Living)

LG: I’m stinky. Please change my diaper, Mommy.

Mike: Daddy will change your diaper.

LG: No, let MOMMY do it.

Mike: No, Daddy’s gonna do it.

LG: No, it’s Mommy’s turn.

Me: No, Daddy changes stinky diapers.

LG: Oh! That’s right.

Glad we got that straight. ;)

I haven’t done a photo essay in a few months because it’s just been too darn hot to be outside for more than a few minutes, but today it was overcast and there was a bit of a breeze, so I was able to take a few pictures before I got too sweaty. (Read on …)

from Never a Dull Moment…

Accent: I don’t really have one, but I can copy them pretty well!

I don’t drink: coffee. I’ve never been able to stand the taste, no matter how much sugar and cream I put in it.

Pets: Melody - our almost 2 year old Australian Cattledog mix.

Essential Electronics: my laptop, my DVR, my digital camera, and my cellphone

Perfume: Anais Anais

Gold or Silver: Gold

Insomnia: Well, I can sleep, but I can rarely sleep straight through the night. Maybe in 20 years or so. ;)

Job Title: Mom :D

Most admired trait: Loyalty
Least admired trait: Hypocrisy

Kids: Little Girl, age 2 years 8 months

Phobia: Falling

Religion: Catholic (but that doesn’t mean I’m pleased with the church all the time)

Siblings: none (my parents did have a baby before I was born, but he only lived a few hours)

Time I Wake Up: Whenever LG wakes up, which is usually somewhere between 7 and 8. Or if she happens to sleep in, whenever I wake up freaking out because she’s not awake yet. ;)

Unusual Talent or Skill: My ability to remember trivial facts

Vegetable I Refuse to Eat: Canned spinach…blech

Worst Habit: biting my fingernails, although I rarely do it anymore

X-rays: too many to remember, but none since I had my car accident in Northern Ireland in 2003

My Favorite Meal: Salmon, rice, and steamed veggies

If you would like to play, have at it!

Having never had another 2 1/2 year old to compare her to, it’s hard for me sometimes to know whether or not LG is exceptionally brilliant, or just like every other 2 1/2 year old child. I like to think she is exceptionally brilliant (as most mommies do I suppose). And I also like to use this here blog to record some of these exceptionally brilliant (which may be just exceptionally normal) things she does.

Take last night, for example. I was playing some songs for Mike that we have to learn for our monthly church gigs which are starting back up in a couple of weeks, and then he had to go outside for some reason and LG wanted more music so she could dance. So, I started randomly playing her songs that were in my iTunes. I clicked on Avril Lavigne’s “Girlfriend” and she looks at me and says, “That’s ‘Fink You Dance’!” And indeed, it was a song they used for one of the dances on So You Think You Can Dance. In the FIRST week. And she remembered!

The next song I played was “Home” by Chris Daughtry (which happens to be the ring on my cell phone when Mike calls). I figured she’d mention the cell phone thing, but instead, she said “That’s Merican Idol!” And indeed, that was the song they used every week on American Idol when someone left. But American Idol hasn’t been on since, what? June? And my cell phone plays that song several times a week.

And then there’s the fact that she can tell me exactly what American Idol’s song I’m playing (even if it’s the original version of the song rather than the American Idol version). “Dat’s Chris!” “Dat’s Blake!” “Dat’s Jordin Parks!” “Dat’s Gina!” “Dat’s Vil!” And so forth. And if I play “You Give Love a Bad Name”, she tells me “Dat’s Blake! Blake have black hair!” (because that was the week he died his hair black).

Mike says she remembers all of this because her mind is not as cluttered as our minds are. But me? I like to think that my exceptionally brilliant daughter is one day going to be the Trivial Pursuit champion of the world.

I’ve heard it said that being a mother is like having a piece of your heart forever beating outside your body. And the truth in that is profound.

I have never worried as much about another person as I worry about my daughter. I worry about so many things. Every time we get in the car, I say a little prayer that we’ll make it to our destination and back safely. Every time I leave her somewhere without me, I don’t totally relax until she’s safely back home with me. I worry that she’ll get lost or hurt or injured or that someone will hurt her feelings. Every time I see a story on the news about a child who has some horrible disease, I pray fervently that she will grow up healthy and strong. I worry that I’m not doing the right things for her to help her grow into a kind loving person. I worry that her refusal to eat certain foods will somehow stunt her growth. I worry about silly things, about things I should worry about and about things I have no control over. In short, I worry a. lot.

But one of the things that scares me the most, I think, is that I will have to leave her before she is grown. And that she will lose her sweet, happy, joyful little soul because she will have to suffer a loss at a young age. That scares me a lot.

So maybe you can understand how freaked out I was about something being wrong with those tests. What if it was this? What if it was that? I was hell to live with for a couple of days. Every time I looked at my little girl, I wasn’t sure whether to smother her with hugs and kisses or burst into tears. So, there was much relief when I heard what the issue of concern was.

But it made me think. What can I do to make sure I’m around for as long as possible? And whatever it is, don’t I owe it to her to make sure I do all those things? We’d all like to think we’re immortal, but unfortunately we are not, and the older we get, the better we need to take care of our bodies. Even if we don’t want to.

I want to see my little girl grow up. I want to see her graduate from high school and college and graduate school if she so chooses. I want to be at her wedding and I want to babysit my grandchildren. And I’d like to see them graduate and get married, too.

I don’t have control over everything in my life. I sure as heck don’t have control over my heart issues. But I do have control over a lot of other things. So I need to take that control and do the best I can to be healthy. For my daughter, my husband, my future grandchildren, but most importantly for myself, so that I can have the best quality of life that is possible for as long as I’m here.

So time to make some changes. It won’t be easy, but I’m going to do the best I can. I can’t ask more of myself than that.

All the ultrasound test results were normal. Except there is a small (very small) mass on the uterine wall which is “probably” a fibroid. Personally, I think it’s scar tissue from when I had the c-section because of the partially detached placenta and my doctor told me it was a mess in there and that he tried to get everything out but there might be some left. So, I’m not really concerned. I have to go see him for my yearly exam anyway, so we can discuss it then.

The blood tests results are not back yet, but she will call me Friday with those. And I don’t really expect there to be anything wrong. As I said to Marlene today, I think my heart problems are a big enough cross for me to bear. Ya know?

Now about those palpitations I’ve been having. I tried to get an appointment with my cardiologist yesterday just to check, but my doctor is changing practices and is no longer seeing patients. And there weren’t any other appointments available this week other than one that was too far for me to want to drive. So, I figured since I was going to see my regular doctor, I’d talk to her about it. She did an ekg and it came back abnormal (which is normal for me if you think about it :P) and then called the cardiologist’s office and faxed ekgs back and forth. And lo and behold, they decided they could see me today. Amazing huh? So I zipped over there and the doctor (who was new to me) told me not to worry about the palpitations unless they were accompanied by rapid heartbeat and no medication was necessary at this time.

So, basically all that worrying was wasted. But I guess that’s a good thing right?

Mike and I actually managed to get out and see a movie tonight - Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. My short review follows. There are spoilers. (Read on …)

• Probably only two people will actually get the significance of that title, but that’s okay…lol!

• The Space Shuttle Endeavor, carrying a teacher trained as an astronaut, just landed safely. I will never ever forget Christa McAuliffe and the space shuttle explosion back in 1986. I was 19 and working as a receptionist for a janitorial service, and I often drove home for lunch. My mom called me before I left because she didn’t want me to hear the news on the radio while I was driving on the freeway “and have a wreck” as she put it. I even still remember what I was wearing.

• My doctor’s office called yesterday to schedule an appointment to talk about my test results and send me to a specialist. I’m trying to remain calm by telling myself that if they were really worried they would send me straight to the specialist with no visit in between. So I’m hoping the specialist is a “just to make sure” kind of thing. But prayers and good thoughts are appreciated. (And no I don’t know anymore than that yet. I’ll see the doctor tomorrow.) Just what I needed - one more thing to worry about. :P

• We are finally going to see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix tonight. It was actually my least favorite book of the series, mostly because the character of Dolores Umbridge made me sooooo angry.

• Speaking of the series, after I read book 7, I went back to the beginning and read all of the books over again. I enjoyed them just as much the 2nd time! I’m now rereading book 7. I don’t know what on earth I’m going to do once I’m done - no more Harry Potter. Until the next movie comes out anyway. *sniffle*

• Normally we go on vacation the first week of September, so I’d be getting ready for that, but we’re having to put vacation off for awhile because of that nasty little thing called “money”. Things are a little tight right now, but they will be getting better soon. And with all this medical stuff going on, it’s probably better to wait until things are a little more settled on that front. I haven’t heard back from my cardiologist regarding the CT Scan yet, but I’m expecting that call any day now. Yay.

• Forgot one of my random points! For those who don’t know I have a little TV blog where I rant and rave about my favorite television shows. I get an average of 3 hits per day, so it’s not really a big deal, but I enjoy writing entries over there, so I keep doing it. However, another much more popular blog linked to one of my posts and in the past two days, I’ve gotten around 300 hits! I doubt most of those people will ever come back, but it’s fun to see your blog get a gazillion hits now and then…lol!

A label for darn near everything. via Parent Hacks

What makes kids successful in school? via Parent Dish

Galoshes are not something we really need here in the desert, but if you use them, this is a cute idea.

Last week, I linked to Spock - a people finder, but there’s also Pipl which gave me more results when I gave it a try. via Lifehacker

How to clean your toaster.

Ever wondered what the lyrics to your favorite song really mean? Well, wonder no more!

10 surprising uses for aspirin! via Lifehacker

Ever wanted to save a youtube video to your hard drive? Well now you can.

10 things to do with lemons. via Lifehacker

I firmly believe in vaccinations. They not only protect my own child, but others as well. However, I’ve been really torn about the HPV vaccination. Luckily, I have several years before my daughter is old enough to start thinking about giving it to her, but I’m glad I’m not the only one who has reservations. via Crunchy [On the Inside]

Pretty recipe of the week

Tip of the week: To prevent discoloration when storing a red pasta sauce or chili in a clear plastic container, first wipe the bottom, sides and lid with a paper towel dipped in vegetable oil. (from simple & delicious magazine)

Two words you don’t want to hear your 2 1/2 daughter say as she’s running around the house without clothes prior to getting in the bathtub: “I leak!”

Nothing exciting going on around here. Unless you count going to get medical tests as exciting.

Tuesday I had three ultrasounds (pelvic, abdominal and thyroid) to make sure everything is kosher and today I had a CT scan on my heart to map it. The CT scan itself was short and not really a big deal. But the getting the “contrast” into my veins was a bit of a deal. Took two tries. And look at that purdy bruise… (Read on …)

Spend half the afternoon with your hand stuck under a sheet pretending its a baby, complete with sound effects.